Excuse me, here's my resume.

As you can see, I have years of experience
entertaining birthday parties.

Stop. We don't need anymore clowns.

But sir, I'm very skilled 
in various areas of clowning.

Including card tricks and balloon animals.

But I'm also open to learning 
new things on the job.

How do you feel about 
being shot out of a cannon?

Oh, wow... um... Okay, I guess.

Great!

Are you ready?

Ready!

3... 2... 1....

We don't need anymore goddamn clowns!